Corporate Pay

So the Obama administration and the congressional democrats are looking to put a wage cap on companies that receive bailout money. I think this is a good thing…for starters. Of course the government is in a special place here where they actually have some clout and some reason for putting such restrictions in place. I am, of course, totally against government intervention into truly private business and trying to dictate wages of any sort; I guess I even have trouble with the minimum wage…even though those in government who advocate for more equal distribution of wealth should realize that increases in the minimum wage actually decreases employment. Milton Freedman (who won a nobel prize in economics) called the minimum wage law the most “anti-negro” law in US history. Its passage caused the lay-offs of close to a half-million African American workers who were then replaced by more highly trained whites. I’m not sure I agree with his assessment but I do think it’s a step in the wrong direction. But that’s not really the point here…I’m more concerned with the other end of the scale. I suppose what I desire is a new accountability of CEOs to their stockholders. Clearly this is going to be an issue put forward by groups of concerned investors who are going to want to see a positive ROI for themselves. If I were a major investor in a corporation (I’m not a MAJOR investor in any large corporations), I would want a system wherein my CEO was paid a percentage of gross profits. No limits on the amount of money they could make. Well what if the company posts a loss? Well that might not always be the fault of the CEO, so in these cases their performance should be judged on their performance as it relates to average gains and losses across their business sector. If they outperform their competitors…put their pay at the 75^th percentile for the company payroll. If they underperform put them at the 25^th percentile for payroll. I think that a CEO of a major corporation who was promised 0.01% of gross profits would be much more inclined to make smart informed decisions on the part of his employer rather than decisions in his own best interest (because now they would be the same…not always so when a CEO sits on the boards of 30 other firms). Along those same lines, I think we should look into the salaries of our law-makers. The  house of representatives should be working for the will of the people while the senate should be for restraint and forward thinking. With that in mind, house salaries should be determined relative to the cost of living. Senate salaries should be determined by the ratio of government surplus to average tax burden. Thus a system where high government surplus (only until the national debt is paid off) with high tax burden yields a low ratio with low pay. A high government surplus with low tax burden yields an increase in pay and a low government surplus and high tax burden means they get booted out of office. If only the people could vote on congressional pay rates and not the recipients of that pay. Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Johnny Cash

 

So When Are you Finishing?

Grading and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Of all the books I have ever read, my favorites are “Atlas Shrugged”, “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” and the “Scarlet Letter.” I find a lot of good in all of them. For those of you familiar with the first two…you might be surprised that I listed them together because they are, in some respects, diametrically opposed to one another. In one instance, we have Atlas shrugged that portends that preservation of one’s self and the rights to do so can inform society on absolute moral grounds. More specifically, that government and society should let the individual be free to do as he wishes and that the only moral causes in life are those that facilitate that end. “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” takes a decidedly more relativist approach to morals and “quality” and explores the interplay between classical and romantic definitions of value. He espouses learning and rational thought but is unwilling to throw out intuition in his attempt to define the good which is not always the truth. Of course, I am one to believe with most of my being that “the truth” and “the good” are one and that the value set with which those are defined can in fact be an absolute. That is, there is a set of morals that is “the truth” without which you will never find “the good” in life. I still like “ZMM” because I think it has a lot to say on how we define the good in life and brings to light places where rational thought is difficult (though never impossible) to utilize. I bring all this up not because I was thinking about either one of these two works when I woke up this morning but rather because of a somewhat convoluted chain of thought that led me here. It starts with the grading system at WPI which is somewhat unique in academia in that students are graded on an A/B/C scale but if they get the equivalent of a D or an F that grade is replaced by an NR, or “No Record.” This essentially (though not entirely) expunges that class from a student’s records and they are allowed to repeat it until they receive a passing grade. The thought process here is that students should be allowed to learn on their own terms without fear of failure. The end results being an institution where excellence is promoted and students may learn without fear or apprehension. My opinion is that this grading scheme is a load of crap. Other think so as well and the faculty will soon be voting on whether to return (after nearly 50 years) to a more standard grading scale. Many of the undergraduates are understandably upset by this idea and are attempting to stage a protest…which reminds me of my time at UMass when a senior administrator for the university voiced the opinion that student protest rarely get a response because the faculty are all fully aware that most of those who they disappoint will be gone in 3-4 years and those that come in new will have never known the old system. Thus the longest discontent that a policy can create is just long enough to graduate those who were disappointed. The constant turnover of students makes faculty accountability to the wishes of the student minority a moot point. I feel that this will likely be the case here as well. Anyways, in response to the proposed changes an undergraduate wrote a treatise on the matter defending the grading scheme as it stands now. Another students made the connection to Robert Pirsig, author of Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. It seems to me that the student was only half right in this case and really missing the boat on modern society and the role of the university. If you’ve read my previous post, “On Academia” then you will be familiar with my feelings on the state of the University in contemporary American society. Unfortunately the ideal of academia has been quite lost for quite a long time and so it this point it serves a very different purpose than for what it was first intended. While I can totally see Pirsig’s view that academia should be a place of learning and an anti-authoritarian utopia (which is strangely not all that opposed to “Atlas” if we replace academia with government…which in some instances are often the same thing); I also fully recognize that we live in a world where that ideal has fallen by the wayside and if we are to maintain rational thought (my guiding principle on all of this), then we must work to both change the system while at the same time maximizing the utility of that which currently stands. In this vein, the university is at its best, a training ground for young men and women. As part of that training, a student requires honest evaluation and examination. While an ideal system would have this be entirely internal to the student…the system is currently held to the external standards of funding agencies and governments, potential employers, and parents (though these really should all be left out in a perfect world). The result is that some form of external verification of training received is demanded and that verification through examinations and the like is a necessary evil of the world as it stands now. For WPI to ignore that is to be short sighted to point of absurdity and while the envisioned themselves as the keepers of the academic flame back in the sixties they have long since fallen into line in most other ways with other institutions of higher learning. And yet, they retain this foolish grading system while simultaneously prolonging and exacerbating the coddling of a generation of young people. Pirsig would not advocate for our current system and instead, would favor no grades at all but only if that meant that there was no accountability to the world outside. The ultimate anti-authoritarian system where it is actually enforced that students will come to learn and learn only. Instead we have an awful in-between world in which the student is held half-accountable and artificially inflated only to be taken into a world which operates on a different playing field. The enter the university feeling privileged to have such a system and leave certainly suffering an immense disservice to learn that the rest of the world plays by more truly egalitarian rules in which failure is punished (unless you can get a government bailout of course) and success is solidified and meaningful. WPI needs to understand that “The Truth” and “The Good” are one in the same and that the separation of these serves no one. Patrick OUT!!!

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Atlas Shrugged

I'll teach you a lesson

So I’ve been teaching a class for the past week or so and let me tell you…it’s a lot of work. I suppose that a good portion of the work comes from the fact that I’m teaching a class that I’ve never taught in the past which means that my material is created de novo. I wouldn’t characterize it as particularly difficult just time consuming. Also, I don’t want this admission of difficulty to take anything away from my previous statements about that status of education in this country. I still believe that home schooling should be allowed and that public school systems have become largely a breeding ground for mediocrity that slowly but surely weed out the most promising young teachers. In the interest of fair play, I also think that the college level teaching could use an overhaul as well…of course I just talked about that issue. Regardless, trying to convey a message to a group of individuals with such a diverse variety of backgrounds as is found in a classroom is no small challenge. Of course in the end, the difficulty in teaching is proportional to how much you care about the results. While this is true of many professions, in teaching it is pretty easy to skate by and not give a damn about any of it and few people will notice (except your students). I do take some pride in my abilities here and in the effort I put forward in that endeavor. I think I’m a much better instructor in the laboratory than in the classroom and would much prefer that particular arena to the classroom I find myself in now. To make matters worse, my mentor (see my last post for commentary there) has decreed that I shall not use powerpoint whilst performing my professorial duties. Her reason…none. Ok, so I do what I’m told…because I’m spineless like that. It sucks, I could cover so much more and in so much more depth if I wasn’t constantly writing on the board and dealing with overhead slides. I would guess that the lack of powerpoint cuts my classroom productivity by close to 30%. Luckily, after this term I can use powerpoint to my heart’s content. Its just the perfect tool for this sort of thing. In my class last semester I had multimedia (photos, videos, animations) everything was on the slide that they needed to know and at the end of the day I could upload the slide which the students could download. The end result is a focus on paying attention to what I’m saying and on their own comprehension and not with scribbling notes in a book which they might never use. Technology is meant to be used…not ignored. Only two more classes…Patrick OUT!!!

What I’m listening too: Alison Krauss and Union Station

Mentorcide

So I am becoming more and more averse to my mentor/advisor/BOSS. I can’t write a whole lot about it here because this is a public forum (which she doesn’t read currently…thank god). I will summarize the idea in a few simple trends.

1.       Likes to ignore/downplay my ideas until someone else proposes the same thing and then she presents it as the second persons ingenuity

2.       An unyielding stubbornness and amazing capacity for snap judgments with a complete lack of ability to see the other side of an argument

·         I know I’ve probably been accused of the same thing because I have strong opinions on lots of issues…the key difference is that I pride myself on knowing the other side of an argument and making a reasoned (usually) choice to believe the way I do. I am also fully willing to change my views if new evidence comes to light that makes my old view foolish or incorrect

·         For instance, we fought about the correct usage and definition of a word…one would think that the dictionary would be the ultimate resource on such matters…I found out that its apparently not the case

3.       Lack of empathy for people around her while simultaneously taking things extraordinarily personally.

4.       Immature and unproductive response to criticism of any sort no matter how well-intentioned

Some of you may be saying…OK, what do you do about it? The answer…not much. I’m fairly spineless in dealing with her and I routinely yield to her on matters like these because the result of me pushing back is NEVER positive. Instead, I work around the ridiculousness and try to get my way within the system hoping she never finds out I did so. I feel better now.

“Thanks for noticing me” - Eeyore

Patrick OUT!!!

What I’m Listening Too: Sarah McLachlan (don’t look at me that way…she is very talented and I’m confident in my sexuality)

 

On Academia

So we have had a lot of faculty candidates come in to interview and present their work to the department (actually 2 departments for 3 positions). I have had the good fortune to meet with most of them and talk about careers and listen to their stories of how they got where they are now. I have been mostly underwhelmed by the whole experience and really it makes me want to be done being a grad student more than ever. Its not so much that I want to be where they are now but more a sense that I should be where they are now. In all likelihood, a few of these individuals will be hired as full time tenure-track faculty and while that’s nice…I was hoping they would be more outstanding. I wanted to know that there was something to aspire to for the next 2-4 years as I travel down a similar path. These people have essentially solidified the idea that I’m not going to go all that much farther in the next four years, or if I do advance farther it will not necessarily be of much benefit. I seriously hope I’m wrong about the whole thing but after seeing faculty at our university and others who are really kind of clueless, the pedestal of academia has been lowered substantially. That famed ivory tower seems more manageable but not in that good way. I was truly hoping that the idealism would last a bit longer as motivation for long hours, mediocre wages, and little recognition. Instead, I feel myself pulled towards a job in industry as an academic “sell out.” I suppose I’m probably judging things a bit too harshly and that this is all reactionary to some degree but the consistent pull to have a job that is certainly less stressful day to day (unless you risk being fired or your company bought out), and better pay has some degree of appeal. I’m thinking now that a post-doctoral appointment someplace may be the last  foray into academia for me. It’s a shame really because I think I could have been a decent professor but at the same time, I think that academia(especially the sciences) is going in truly the wrong direction for the future. Professors obsess over funding of research and in that pursuit are forced to kill many creative ideas as being too risky to suggest. Instead our major funding agencies look for sure things with immediate relevance when they should be looking for things that are innovative approaches to problems. They are terrified of the unknown instead of being excited by it. Furthermore, the transition of academic culture into an institution of training and a product to be sold is a bit disheartening. While the transition is by my own standards the way things were destined to be; when faced with it day to day…I’m not sure I like it. I guess its all symbolic of the infantilizing of a generation and my own romanticizing of the past. An age past wherein you turned 18 and were a man in your own right who could work, support a family, fight a war, or any combination of those things. Now we have high school part 2 where young men and women can avoid being men and women for 4-6 years while someone else foots the bill. It seems entirely sensible to me that we should abandon the paradigm  that individuals attend college immediately after high school. Rather a system where college is just one of many options presented with no particularly greater or lesser value ascribed to it which might avoid the relegation of a fairly noble institution to a 4 year holding pattern for life. Some students will emerge from their basic primary education and have an earnest curiosity and desire to expand their intellectual pursuits and may go to college or may choose to study on their own and seek out their own individual training in such things. Others may pursue a trade or start a family and may find that college merely gets in the way of those certainly noble goals. And still others may choose to do nothing, indeed, many of those people (the do-nothings) in this day would go to college as only a pre-emption of their continuing to do nothing upon their matriculation into life. Why not just save the money and time and get a head start on life and what’s worthwhile. Furthermore, some jobs for which our society demands a college education…just plain old don’t need one. These are the jobs that were filled for decades by people without a piece of paper saying they sat in classrooms for four years doing crosswords. We need to reevaluate the place of academia in society and for better or for worse, understand that its not for everyone; that is to make it that much better for those who would truly benefit from it. I am a firm believer that no amount of formal education will make a person into a creative, functioning, driven adult and that rather these are purely personal pursuits that no amount of tuition paid will hasten to completion. Maybe I should have trained as a blacksmith or something…Patrick OUT!!!

Just what I've been waiting for

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D95V13SO0&show_article=1

 

So here it comes…a showdown for the ages. The new “young gun” administration vs. “the lion of the senate.” So it seems, that President Obama is going to render some sort of decision on the fate of “Cape Wind” the proposal to station more than 100 giant wind turbines off of cape cod that would generate electricity for the state. The project is slated to cost close to a billion dollars but could produce enough electricity to supply 75% of cape cods demand at any given time and offset carbon emissions to the tune of 1 million tons annually. So its expensive but it might just be the wave of the future and really it’s a neat trial for the technology. Dear old senator kennedy opposes the plan. Why you ask…well he says its because it it would harm fish and birds that live near the area. So the government commissioned a study and come to find out they determined that the plan was environmentally sound. Hmmm…what else could it be senator. Oh wait, maybe your house on cape cod…is it going to ruin your view? A couple of specks of clean energy generation more than 5 miles off shore. Now, I understand. If he was really concerned about the environment then he would support the plan…not only because of the already mentioned reasons but also because of the reduction in oil that would need to be shipped to the cape cod power station. Over the past 32 years…there have been two incidents that combined spilled close to 8 million gallons of oil off the coast of cape cod which killed thousands of birds and fish and shut down shell fish beds for weeks. Wouldn’t it be nice to not have to worry about those things…but senator ted doesn’t agree. While regular readers will surely know that I am no big fan of governor Patrick…he definitely has it right on this one and I hope he presses Obama to use his considerable clout to push this project through. The state could use a boost to the economy (jobs putting these things up and supporting the crews who do) and it could use the energy too. Come now teddy, its time to look past your mansion’s ocean front view and towards the future of energy independence. Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Bobby Darin

 

What...too soon?

So apparently President Obama paid a quick impromptu visit to the press corps area at the white house. When asked a serious questions about the relevance of his ban on lobbyists and his deputy defense secretary’s former work as a defense industry lobbyist…he got a little miffed. Too soon Mr. O? Honeymoon not over? I guess I’m not surprised at his response to the question…it was pretty hard hitting and quite observant on their part which is more surprising given how much they all fawned over him during the election. To be honest, it puts some of my worries aside, mainly the concern that the true role of the press as governmental watchdog was going away as they are all “in the tank” for obama. This is not to say, that we shouldn’t be mindful of media bias…it clearly exists (on both sides). On a side note…I object to the term…mainstream media bias. Because really, in the age of the internet…mainstream media hardly exists or matters anymore. Sure lots of people watch the evening news but lots of people listen to right wing radio…the fact of the matter is that people’s political views aren’t so much determined by the network the watch or the pundit the hear but rather by which arguments make sense to them. There are people on both sides of every issue that believe one thing or another for both good and bad reasons. They are idiots and geniuses that go both ways. So mainstream media doesn’t factor into the equation because idiots don’t change their minds much because they can’t understand the reason for doing so and smarter folk evaluate their sources. Furthermore, people always like to believe that they are in the majority and that its just a small group of stupid people that make it tough for all the sensible ones. Thus people look for news outlets that agree with them on the issues already because then they can avoid conflict. Conservatives listen to the radio and liberals watch Chris Mathews and Keith Olberman. Conservatives read the wall street journal and liberals read the new York times. Sometimes people cross over but its just because they WANT to be appalled. The point of it all is that we have both sides on these issues and as long as that is maintained then media of both persuasions will continue to be a watchdog for the government. In the end, that’s the point…just like we need the police to watch and make sure nobody robs our houses when we go to work…so do we need the reporters to watch the government when no one else will and make sure that they are always accountable to the people. Obama should work on making friends with these people because the honeymoon is going to be over quicker than he things and the times they are a changin’. Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Bonnie Raitt

Atheist Auto Sales

So as I was driving in to work this morning, I noticed a new sign on the way. In shrewsbury one of the small local auto dealers has changed its name (maybe management too) to “Miracle Car Sales.” Their sign has a small “jesus fish” in the corner which leads me to surmise that we have an auto dealer with a truly Christian bent. I’m not sure I would buy a car from such a place. I think I would rather my auto dealer be either atheist, agnostic, or at the very least apathetic to religion. I mean just imagine buying a car from Miracle Auto Sales…sure they give you a good deal but what if you need repairs. Do they pray about whats wrong with it and hope that god gives them a clue in a jelly donut shaped like your carburetor. If you need a bumper repair, do they send you to a transubstantiation body shop? I, for one, think that the world needs a truly secular auto buying experience. I propose the following. Patrick’s Atheist Auto Sales! I even have a catchy tag line for our cheap TV ads: “Come on down…Sunday Sunday Sunday…its not like we have something better to do.” We would of course be the next evolution in auto sales…if you believe in that sort of thing. Of course, I wouldn’t half ass any of this, we would have a full service auto megaplex here. “We don’t walk on water car washes.” “ Deist Dent and Ding Services with Atheistic Attention to Detail.” “Plus unlike those jesus loving auto dealers…YOU are our number one priority.” I could make millions off the 8% of the public that are non-believers…or maybe not. Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Ben Folds

A "Trav"esty

So I wonder if this is a recipe for hate mail but I’m going to go after some people today, who in my opinion, are the closest thing we have to actual terrorists in this country right now. They are the biggest threat to national security that I can see and they exist almost entirely uncontested right under the nose of homeland security. Actually its two groups, one big and one small but both with far undue influence. The post is really being spurned on by the death of Jet Travolta, son of John Travolta and Kelly Preston. Now, I’m not one to make a child’s death into a political statement but it does bring to light the issues surrounding scientology. I’m not going to say that scientology played a role in Jet’s death but the community should be mindful of what this church says and where it comes from. A church that for no ideas founded on reason, opposes the use of any sort of drug relating to mental diseases. They purport that all disease is a manifestation of some sort of spiritual upheaval within the person that can be cured with specialized and expensive counsel. I’m going to avoid the usual tack of going after scientology with the old, “it’s a religion made up by an old drugged out second-rate science fiction writer hungry for money and attention.”  Instead, I’m going to say that dianetics and all its associated auditing, thetans, xenu and the like are total and complete bullshit of the first degree. I, for one, have trouble believing much in the way of spiritual things and so I find it even harder to believe that someone could be swayed by the everest sized pile of cow dung that is the modern church of scientology. I can only imagine that people with too much time on their hands and a need for a solution to their problems bite into this, are brainwashed in a cult mentality and at some point become too embarrassed to admit that they fell for it so they instead defend it to the end. Which brings me to group number two. The parents and activists who routinely claim that child hood vaccines and thimersol are linked to autism. I’m going to briefly speak as a scientist here and say: THERE IS NO LINK. There has never been a credible study done to show a link there. Child hood vaccines have saved millions of lives and will continue to do so unless these crazies with no scientific training get their way. It is a classic example of people not understanding what the hell they’re talking about and making a judgment they are not fit to make. In this instance, the judgement has been taken by the media without fact checking as a means for scaring the crap out of new parents for the sake of ratings with the consequence of hysteria. Of course the true consequence is that children may be forsaking vaccines that could potentially save their lives. The risks associated with thimerasol are still only theoretical risks and even with the theoretical (read: not grounded in good science) risks do not even approach the life-saving potential of these miracles of modern medicine. The people that purport these ideas should be put on the same level as those in the religious community that make it their business to preach intolerance and hatred and to incite violence amongst their congregants towards nonbelievers. In short, they should be prosecuted for willfull negligence of the facts and for the same reason that it is illegal to yell fire in a crowded theater; their speech should also be cause for legal recourse. Indeed, in ruling on the limits of free speech Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes wrote in his opinion

 

“The question in every case is whether the words used are used in such circumstances and are of such a nature as to create a clear and present danger that they will bring about the substantive evils that the United States Congress has a right to prevent.”

 

These items CLEARLY fall within the realm of causing a “clear and present danger” to millions of children under the watchful eye of well-meaning but under-informed parents.  Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Old Crow Medicine Show

Why the Internet was Invented

 

Shopaholic Dies in Avalanche of Clothing

 

Yes, you read that right. A woman in the UK was buried alive in a pile of shoes, suitcases, and other items of conspicuous consumption. It is a rare thing in life when something so clearly metaphorical is acted out in reality. I mean this is like a crappy new Yorker cartoon come to life…its astounding.

Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Bob Dylan

I'm moving there

Bureau of Labor Statistics

 

So according to the US bureau of labor statistics more than 1% of the population of Montana is employed as a bartender. Wow…that’s a lot of bartenders. I mean seriously, does a state really need one person for every 100 people to be a bartender. Now you might be thinking well that’s not too unreasonable but lets be clear here. Not all of those 100 people are going to be drinking. We can remove people who are not 21 which brings us to about 70 people. We can probably also take out a good number of people below the poverty line because they aren’t going to be drinking in bars much. But conservatively, we can say that half the people in poverty still drink in cheap bars. This still takes away another 7 people from our 100 bringing us down to 63 montanans. Of course 3% of the state is mormon and they don’t drink either so we lose two more there. Down to 61 folks. The bartender isn’t drinking on the job so we can take him out of the mix which makes it 60 people being served. So now we have 1 bartender for every 60 drinkers in a town. That’s a lot of bartenders. I mean lets suppose that a bar might have 6 people at any given moment in the day (sometimes more and sometimes less) but if they average less than that then they probably don’t need a bartender. Lets then say that they all really like their bartender (because not surprisingly he knows them personally) and so they decide to stay for 3 hours at a time, and are responsible and only have two drinks. Lets then say that the bar closes at 2:00 am and opens at 2:00 pm for a nice even 12 hour shift. We’ll be conservative and say the bartender works all 12 hours. Over 12 hours, 24 people will come into our fictitious bar and will have 48 drinks. Which means that in a 7 day week, we are talking about 168 people and 336 drinks. If we then remember that each bartender is only serving on average 60 people in Montana. In the span of a week, each and every eligible and wanting person is being served at least 5-6 drinks by a bartender. Of course, I’m using conservative numbers for the estimation, so in reality there are probably more people needed to keep a bar running because a bar that sells only 336 beers/drinks in a week is probably just barely keeping, the lights on, the kegs full, and a bar keep paid (even assuming minimum wage an owner would need to budget around $2500/month in salaries for his one bartender). So if we take the minimum $2500/ month salary and $1000 month rent plus utilities and $500/month in non beer supplies. The owner needs a margin suitable to cover these $4000/month in expenses.  Moving back to the minimum of 336 drinks/week, they need to make a minimum of about $3/ drink ($4000 / 1344 drinks/month) to break even or sell more than the 5-6 drinks/week/person. So maybe 7-9 drinks/person/ week is more appropriate.  In short, the people of Montana better get busy and start drinking because there must be some suffering bar owners there. I wonder how aspirin sales are in Montana? Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m Listening Too: Blind Boys of Alabama  

Commandments

So I recently had a bit of a debate about the propriety of having the ten commandments in a US courthouse. In line with my belief that we are and should be a secular nation to as much a degree as possible, I am categorically opposed to the ten commandments being placed in any courthouse in the United States. The argument for having such a document besides say the constitution or the declaration of independence is that it forms the historical basis for our legal system…I say nay. I think for a true discussion of the issue, some of you (especially the heathens out there) may need a refresher on the ten commandments themselves. I will take this from the roman catholic tradition (the commandments are numbered differently depending on your faith).

 

1.       I am the lord, and thou shalt have no other gods before me and thou shalt not worship false idols

2.       Thou shalt not take the lord’s name in vain

3.       Thou shalt keep holy the Sabbath

4.       Honor thy father and thy mother

5.       Thou shalt not kill

6.       Thou shalt not commit adultery

7.       Thou shalt not steal

8.       Thou shalt not bear false witness

9.       Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife

10.   Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house

11.    

So lets just take a look at these and see where our legal code fits in. Of course, we have our own version of numbers 5, 6 and 7 but I would argue that it is really a reflection of an evolutionary required and rationally required law that members of the same species should not kill each other or otherwise subvert each other’s well being. Furthermore, the bible is definitely not the first time such  laws were passed down. In deed the Code of Ur-Nammu, predates dear moses by more than 700 years. Lets take a look at the others. Numbers 1 and 2 are specifically made moot by the 1^st amendment that says not only can you worship whoever you want, but you have the freedom to blaspheme  everyone else’s gods too. Number 3 was pretty much done in when people couldn’t even agree which day was the Sabbath. Furthermore, modern grad students have no knowledge of the alleged weekend and thus are unfamiliar with the Sabbath in general. Number 4 is a nice thought, but I would guess that most people pretty easily toss this one aside whenever the situation suits them. Number 8 is pretty good, so I will give that one to the 10 commandments, though I have a feeling that it was probably around before moses. It does remind me though, that should I ever be put on the stand I will need to request another book (besides the bible) to pledge my sacred oath on. I’m thinking I might use the Darwin’s “The Origin of Species.” Something like, “Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help you Dawkins.” As far as those last two go, I think they are un-American…what are we if not covetous of things…isn’t that why people get credit cards and the divorce rate is greater than 50%. If they were illegal, think about how many of us would be in jail. So in summation, we have exactly 4 commandments that are truly relevant to our legal system…of those, at least three were coined way before moses ever came off the mountain. Even if we take all four that’s only a score of 40% for commandment relevance…that’s not a passing grade.  Keep your commandments out of my court room. Patrick OUT!!!

 

Chicago Schools Spend $67,000 on cappuccino machines

As an addendum to yesterdays posting on home schooling…I submit the following evidence about the gross mismanagement and corruption that is endemic to public schools in the United States, and why all parents should have the fundamental right to remove their children from such a system should they deem it necessary. We as a country can expect any institution with no stake in its own success (i.e. no intrincit benefit in performing well)  and that opposes all objective measurements of that success to succumb to these sorts of problems. A parent who chooses to send their child to private school (with the help of a voucher) or who chooses to educate their children at home not only has a fundamental right to do so but likely has a moral obligation as such (especially if they live in Chicago). The teachers unions and their school boards regularly fight with one another but they both use the same underhanded scare tactics to coerce parents into voting in overrides on their property taxes so that raises can be given. If a teacher wants a raise they should earn the raise as a qualified individual and the value of a teachers services should be set on the open market. I imagine that the true value of a qualified teacher would reach far beyond what many are paid now. The unfortunate side effect of our educational system is that we are still without means of discerning good from bad. In deed, unless a teacher is accused and found guilty of gross physical misconduct with a student or total disregard of job requirements…they will not be fired. We have created a breeding ground for mediocrity in perhaps the most noble of professions. A move towards privatizing education and true freedom of choice in that education is absolutely essential for the preservation of a free society. Our public schools know for certain that they will always receive a bailout no matter how bad things get. In deed, in my own home state, the brand new newton north highschool is going to receive more than $45,000,000 in state aid to complete the project. So now the rest of the states tax payers will be forced to subsidize this absurdly mismanaged project…to what benefit? A private institution would never receive such aid (unless of course they also made oversized and overpriced cars). We have removed all incentive to perform to standards, to innovate in the way education is delivered and to provide a product worthy of the money that is so often thrown its direction. Its time for a change in the way we think about education in this country. Patrick OUT!!!

 

 

Time: California court declares homeschooling illegal

 

So this article is a little old but I can only read the news from so many sources and stay informed. I would encourage you to read the story but the gist of it is as follows. A Los Angeles district court has declared that all children taught in the state of California must be taught by licensed teachers and thus homeschooling is no longer legal (unless the parents happens to be a licensed teacher). The case is now on its way to the state supreme court on appeal where it will hopefully be overturned. It is absolutely un-American in my mind to say that the children of a family should be forced into school against the wishes of a parent. I certainly agree that all children should receive a quality education, with the tacit understanding that the source might not be a public school. It sets a horrible precedent for the government of any state to decree that state sponsored indoctrination (don’t forget, some states still teach intelligent design) must be followed. In relation to state educational supremacy, the following quote:

Hitler said on 1 May 1937:

"The youth of today is ever the people of tomorrow. For this reason we have set before ourselves the task of inoculating our youth with the spirit of this community of the people at a very early age, at an age when human beings are still unperverted and therefore unspoiled.

The first sentence in the official instructors manual for high schools reads:

"The German school is a part of the National Socialist Educational order. It is its obligation to form the national socialistic personality in cooperation with the other educational powers of the nation, but by its distinctive educational means”

Source

I think we could pretty easily substitute California for German and this would still look just about right. The school system and the state has no vested interest in the success of a child, their only interest is in self-preservation. A parent has an inherent (or should have) interest in the success of their children. The state of California is trying to rob the parents and children of that state of a fundamental right to choose and they should be ashamed. A free society is no place for such absurd claims as the courts of California has made and the citizens of that state (whether sending their children to public education or otherwise) should stand up and resist this on moral and ethical grounds.

Patrick OUT!!!

 

What I’m listening too: Ennio Morriconne

 

A Happy Note

 

So I’ve now been informed by two regular readers of this site that my posts have been too depressing recently. This is not on purpose. I’m not depressed in the slightest, rather I think its more a reflection of what I find interesting and furthermore what I think a reader might find interesting. At this point, a blog is not really a reflection of anything and everything that comes through my head in a day. While my posts tend to be pretty scattered in their topics that is really because I only write when I think something deserves to be read. It’s a bit akin to people who talk constantly without saying much of anything as if silence is something to be avoided. I have always taken the approach of trying only to speak when I have something to say. This is not to gloss over the fact that a lot of my posts are little more than frivolous dribble and ramblings…irregardless of that idea, I usually find them either interesting, funny, topical, or in rare instances insightful on a personal sense. I typically don’t share much in the way of personal news and I guess when I do it comes across as depressing…which I suppose might be cause for concern but I don’t think so. The other posts that might be depressing are those in which I’m critical of someone or something. Of course, the individuals and organizations which I criticize tend to be large, powerful, and famous or more likely infamous. These groups don’t really need any pats on the back from little old me or from any readers and so I tend to focus on the critical. This is definitely, unlike my other posts, a distinct reflection on me and my nature. I’m not usually a down individual or prone to “glumness” but I am very critical. I tend to think of it as a positive character trait (though others may not) and respect it quite a bit when I find it in others. So as we move into the new year, you can expect more of whats already been given; a cultural critique as best I can muster. Patrick OUT!!!

 

Also for 2009…A new section in each post, what I’m listening too:

This week: Nina Simone

A better team

So I’ve talked a little bit about this before in that the highlight of my midweek is trivia on Wednesday. A bunch of friends play at a restaurant/pub in Cambridge on a team. The make-up of the team changes from week to week as does our performance. We have a more or less core group of people that go (thankfully they are the people that provide most of the answers) and then a large number of people who make cameo appearances. Being that I’m way too competitive…especially with things like this, and because I’ve played on a good number of trivia teams (many through college and then quite a few since then); I think I finally have a grasp on what makes a team successful or not. I’m going to make my guidelines based on a fairly standard format of 4-6 person teams with limited time to answer and no outside resources (i.e. no iPhones blackberries etc…though I think some people cheat at our particular event). Trivia nights all focus around particular categories and a successful  team has keen understanding of those categories. A team full of people who know “trivia” is paradoxically a bad idea. Instead, you need a division of labor approach where individuals have particular expertise. A great team would have the following key strengths in particular players

 

1.       Pop culture phenom – This is the person that watches too much TV and isn’t too particular to one type of TV. The guy who sits at home watching shark week on the discovery channel all the time isn’t much good here in comparison to the guy who tivos all the prime time dramas and sit-coms from all the major networks. The guy who secretly sits through ryan seacrest’s top40 and reads People magazine like it’s the New York Times. They will be responsible for TV, Music, and Celebrity identification questions. If they can name all the members of the brat pack and the rat pack…you might be set.

2.       The News Junkie – That person who has too much free time and fills it with newspapers, newsweek, time, the economist, and watches CNN headline news. If someone on your team can name members of the council on foreign relations and can name all the member states of the EU…that’s your guy. This person needs to stay up to date on current events. They are actually very similar to the pop culture expert just with different priorities.

3.       The Historian – What was the “bulge” in the battle of the bulge? If know the answer to that…then you might be the historian. A trivia team needs some diversity here too. Being that there is 4000 years of human civilization to cover, questions can never be too specific but the range of possibilities is very high. A history major in college is a good choice, a guy with a PhD in antebellum architecture is not. Both historical but only one is going to get you any place at trivia.

4.       A scientist – Someone to tell the team why degrees Kelvin and degrees Celsius are different. The scientist suffers like all the other categories from being too specific in many cases. While being a scientist myself…I might fit into this category, in reality its probably not my best. The problem stems from being too focused. You need the guy that reads popular science as a hobby and not fungal molecular physiology as a career.

5.       The Sports Nut- the most straightforward but also the most elusive team member. Finding that right mix of sports fan who can not only rattle off baseball stats but can figure out whats going on in a rugby scrum. A knowledge of history is also key here too…players on great teams, recent MVPs and hall of fame inductees are crucial. ESPN watchers are a good start but a student of the game(s) is what’s required.

6.       The Sweeper – The person that picks up the slack with truly useless knowledge. Things that no one should be expected to know are common knowledge to this player. He rattles off that a group of barracudas is called a battery like he just saw it yesterday. This players knowledge is a combination of inspiring and disturbing.

 

If only my regular teams could have these people all the time. For those of you out there reading…we need a sports nut.

Patrick OUT!!!

The Good Old Days

Reading about the controversy surrounding Barack Obama’s choice of the Rev. Rick Warren to lead the invocation at his inauguration, I am struck once again and solidified in my opinion that the United States has an urgent need to address the place of religion in politics. I am quite aware that I am in a minority here in my beliefs…actually more of a minority than I had originally known. A recent study done by the University of Minnesota showed that atheists are perhaps the least trusted or approved of group in the United States. They share a lower standing amongst the majority opinion than Muslims, African-Americans, and homosexuals. I guess that revolution of cultural tolerance hasn’t quite gone far enough. Now, I’m not in the business of telling people what to believe…I have no interest in converting people but I do have an interest in the sanctity of the grand ideals the country was founded on. The text books often cite stories of the pilgrims and their escape from religious intolerance which is all well and good but more important are the people who came those many years later to found a country with a government free of religion. I know the religious right will often claim that our constitution and our founding fathers were a religious bunch who sought to establish a free Christian nation where everyone could practice their faith. That might have been a consequence of their politics but the point originally was to not so much free the people from religious persecution as it was to free the government of religious influence. Read that first amendment again…the same one that protects my rights to rant here also prohibits the government from favoring one religion over another or over non-religion and this purpose has been specifically upheld by the Supreme Court of the United States. Furthermore, our founding fathers who put in place the most brilliant framework for a country in the history of the world were most likely deists if not outright atheists. Why then, almost 250 years later, are we returning to a state where religion has such sway. A place where the only acceptable form of intolerance is that towards non-believers. I’m going to avoid the temptation to list the ills of religious belief and religious intolerance in a society because any cursory inspection of history and role of religion in it will back up my requests for cautioned skepticism. I think that the Obama administration should think carefully about their integration of religion into the Whitehouse. We are leaving behind 8 years of an administration that in my mind has had two great foibles beyond the scope of reason. The first, of course, is sending 3000 young men and women to their deaths in a far off country with an at best nebulous goal in mind and the second is that outrageous integration of religious doctrine into the policy making machinations of the world’s most powerful government. Believe what you want to believe but in the new year a healthy amount of skepticism and a return to the good old days of the founding fathers would do us well. Patrick OUT!!!

A Good Fit

So as I move forward into the new year I am being consistently bombarded both within my own mind and by others to find things that are a good fit. I need a next step in my career that will be a good fit for me. Someplace where I can grow and learn and also feel like I make a contribution to the greater good (don't I sound idealistic now). I also want someplace where I can have fun and do things that are exciting and new. I'm, of course, also looking for new people and more specifically a new person in my life that might be a good fit. I'm not going to list of a profile but let me just say that news of Giselle Bundchen's engagement to Tom Brady was very disheartening...i mean that guys kind of a bum...he hasn't worked in 16 weeks. I guess it just wasn't meant to be...too tall I suppose for me anyways. Which brings me to my last and most attainable goal...clothing that is a good fit. Being a man of less than average verticality but also with less than average circumfrence can make clothing difficult. I know that everyone thinks that nothing good comes in their size when they go look for clothes but I think my problem is a bit different. With men's clothing,to say nothing of women's sizing that is such a rediculously enigmatic thing to me that i'm often left beyond confused in my attempts to understand how a woman's sized can be reduced to a single number that has little if any relationship to any actual dimension...things should be made to measure so it should, in theory, be easy to find suitable shirts and slacks that fit well. Unfortunately, those sizes are all well and good for necks, sleeves, wastes, and inseams but there are crucial other factors that rarely swing in my favor. Most shirts, while fitting fine around the neck and resting nicely along my wrists, have enough extra material in them to supply a team for the Americas Cup. I could never figure out why they did this until I bought a shirt in China (not just made in china, actually marketed to chinese people). It fits great...i can only surmise that it must be due to my exceptional averageness in China. I wasn't the short skinny guy there, rather I was the perfectly proportioned and actually a bit tall gweilo<http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gweilo>. Thus the problem lies in the demographics in america that says that a guy my height should be stocky...ugh, the american obesity crisis hits home. Well I'm off to have a donut...it should make my shirts fit better someday. Patrick OUT!!!

New Years

The last day of the year. I suppose it would be cliché of my to list new years resolutions here because who really cares about the promises I will most likely break within the first two weeks. Instead, I’m going to list the promises I made last year and let you know how I did.

1.       Read more

I guess I did this one…though not in the way I had hoped. I had imagined that I would be able to read a lot more about all the subjects I’m interested in. Instead, I read a lot more for work. Still good, its already given me a leg up in a few areas but I do wish I had taken more time to read myself.

2.       Say YES

This is more in the realm of that new Jim  Carey movie. I wanted to loosen up a bit and take things less seriously than I was prone to before. I’m not sure of my progress in this department but I think I’m definitely feeling more comfortable with where I am in life and looking forward to the future more than I have in quite a while. I’m also feeling quite a bit more liberated than I have in a while and free to pursue this particular goal well into 2009. I suppose the bitterness that followed the events of the fall are starting to slowly fade into optimism and excitement into seeing whats next both in relationships and of course in my career. For the first time in years, it seems that options abound and that my path is in no way laid out and contrary to my typical modus operandi…it feels good to have it that way.

3.       Work Out

This has been really just about as successful as I get. I’m going to pat myself on the back here and say…I’ve been pretty good about this. I’ve been getting consistently stronger, building a body closer to what I’ve wanted for some time and feeling ever so pleased with how its all worked out. In general, I think that I live a pretty healthy lifestyle. I’ve managed to eat well all year and maintained a constant weight while dropping body fat in the process. Less beer, less desserts and more activity have made me feel better than ever. I even ran a 5k for the first time and didn’t die (really my only hope…aside from beating my younger sister). Still some work to do in this department but given the limited efforts I’ve put into it my returns have been great.

4.       Be more patient

Ok…this one didn’t work out so well. My students can definitely vouch for this here. I’m still a bit to driven for everyones tastes and I have trouble turning it down even when appropriate. I want to push them hard and make them keep up. I suppose, I justify it to myself in that I’m helping them but in reality…I’m just judgemental and disappointed a lot of the time. I take it all a little personally sometimes and it really doesn’t work out. Maybe 2009 will be more relaxed but I’m pretty sure it will be the opposite. Hopefully, a few hardnosed students will follow that can take the bullshit that I throw out.

5.       Take more time to volunteer

I pretty much didn’t do this. I feel bad about it. It was my only resolution that didn’t focus on me and it was the one where I really didn’t accomplish it. I was hoping to add in some habitat for humanity work days and maybe something else to boot. I have my regular commitments that I kept up with fairly well but, I didn’t add anything for the year. I guess, I can renew this one and try and do it again.  

 

Cheers! Patrick OUT!!!

Watch yourself

 

Scientists Warn Christmas lights harm the planet

 

In light of my recent posts on the placing of Christmas lights, I would just like to say that not all scientists are TOTAL IDIOTS. There is something to be said for tempering one’s views for purely rhetorical purpose. As science struggles with the modern ethics of humanity, (i.e. stem cells, animal testing, cloning etc), we get these idiots who decide that now is the time to make an essentially political statement that is just unnecessary. I am all for preserving the environment and all, I think it’s a nice idea and something that people should take seriously. However, I also believe that PEOPLE and their HAPPINESS are far more important. If having Christmas lights out for a month a year makes people happy then they should do it. If they feel bad about the energy they are using (note: this is not wasting energy because this does serve a valid purpose…it makes me feel good) then they should unplug a couple of lights for the rest of the year or go camping for a week in the summer and live in the woods without any power at all, whatever makes them happy. But to threaten Christmas light users with the dire predictions of global warming is irresponsible science of the highest caliber. It is the fundamental flaw of science and academics in that we forget that with all the grand ideals of advancing society on an intellectual level, that society is just a collection of individuals who desire not much more than to be happy and that even in a twisted far off way, the goal of science and the intellectual advancement is really the satisfaction and preservation of humanity. Ideas and intelligence garnered through rational inquiry are a gift to society for the purpose of universal fulfillment. These people should remember that science does not exist in a vacuum. Merry Christmas. Patrick OUT!!!

Sometimes I wonder

 

So I get into the lab this morning and my advisor (boss) comes in a bit after me all in a huff. An experimental bioreactor (fermentor) has not been functioning properly and she is going crazy. I ask what went wrong, assuming it was a leak of some sort or an equipment malfunction…she wispers, “I’m not sure but I think its sabotage.” To which I reply, “Are you friggin nuts…that is the most ludicrous thing I’ve ever heard.” Ok, so I didn’t say that but I was thinking it. I chose to be more tactful and reply, “Oh bother…thats bloody awful (in my best English accent).” Ok, so I didn’t really say that, or anything for that matter, in favor of looking at her in stunned silence trying to hide my aching disbelief. I’m not sure at what point in a scientists career they choose to disregard logic but apparently she has reached it. Furthermore, she said this has happened before…RIIIGGGHHTTT. My goodness, I hope I never reach that point. I mean seriously, we work in a fairly secure building (card access all around), who is going to come into a random lab and a random room and mess with a particular knob MULTIPLE TIMES? The answer…no one. Because no one cares about this bioreactor nor should they. The only lesson I learn from this is that when my experiments don’t work now, instead of blaming myself for lack of ingenuity or insight…its going to be sabotage by malicious lab gnomes. Little gremlins hiding my Pasteur pipets and spitting in all my beakers after I wash them. Perhaps santa’s elves are secretly coming in and switching my regular sodium acetate with folger’s potassium acetate chrystals to see if I notice.   I bet that’s it…I could have been in the running for a nobel prize right now if it weren’t for those little imps screwing things up all the time. Remember, “Its not paranoia if they really are out to get you.” Patrick OUT!!!

The Spirit of Christmas

So I was cleaning out my bedroom the other day and of course I found all the things I didn’t know were missing until I started to clean up. Most notable was about $50 in already rolled change from who knows when (which of course will stay in that state unused for some time) and a pile of gift certificates and gift cards from birthdays and Christmases past. I wonder if I have already reached the stage of life where I don’t really have wants. I can remember being a kid and having wants for things…wants that were so strong they certainly felt like needs. Those things gradually became less and less and as I could begin to afford my own “wants” I  didn’t want anywhere near as much. Now, I accumulate acquisitive power in the form of gift cards that I don’t use because I can never decide what I might want or need. Sure, I buy books every so often and read them once or twice. I buy clothes too…but pretty much only when they have moved from being a want to being a need in the most literal sense. The internet has essentially negated my need for both music and movies. I don’t really play games anywhere near as much as I used to and I have only limited hobbies. I do like camping but I’ve reached a point there where unless I decide I’m going to summit everest or thru-hike the AT…I don’t need anything further unless something happens to break. I guess that means I’m the kind of person who that whole “ a donation has been made in your name to [insert name of favorite charity here]” kind of a gift is really pretty good. I think a small part of it is that I’m pretty particular about the things I spend money on. I buy very little for myself without research of some sort or another though I really don’t like shopping and I hate the feeling of buyer’s remorse. This means that I don’t buy things at all frivously and so a gift often feels foreign because its someone elses interpretation of what I might want but the silly thing is that I want so very little that most gifts would never match up. That makes receiving gifts always a bit unsatisfying and I worry that even the donation gift could leave me feeling the same way. Person A says “I didn’t know what to give you so we made a donation to the ASPCA.” I say “Oh that’s great…they do good work.” In my head I think, “Wow, helping animals is nice but we have people that need help too…a donation to Catholic charities would have been better because they have lower overhead and do a good job of helping people.” I suppose its all in the spirit of giving and I shouldn’t be so particular and I don’t want to totally withdraw from Christmas gift giving (though that would honestly suit me just fine). I do enjoy giving gifts when I have the means to but I run into the same problems…I insist on placing the same restrictive rules onto gifts given as I would place on items purchased for myself or items received as a gift. Carefully thought out to provide maximum benefit…trivial presents always seem worse to me than none at all. I know some of you are saying, “it’s the thought that counts.” I totally get that mentality…I just can’t do it. In my twisted Christmas world, I need it to work out both ways. I need the gift to match the thought…something that sends a message. Because even gift giving isn’t altruistic in its entirety…we as people do derive some joy out of making others happy and a crappy gift doesn’t allow me to reap that particular reward. I don’t wanted feigned happiness…I want the real thing and that’s tough to do. So with that said…my Christmas list is pretty empty this year. In case you are really desperate to get me something, I’m a big fan of the following charities and non-profits, a gift to them will make them happy, me happy, and you happy

 

Habitat for Humanity

Boston Foundation

Disabled American Veterans Charitable Service Trust

CARE

Doctors Without Borders

Catholic Charties USA

 

Happy chrismahanukwanzaa! Patrick OUT!!!

 

Love Gone Bad

Love Gone Bad

 

So you need to read the story above for this to make any sense…and look at the pictures. When I first read the story, I thought the world had turned upside down. 35 year old man, refuses sex with 19 year old girlfriend who responds by stabbing him in the face. What??? Then I saw the pictures and I understood entirely. If that woman came to me looking for some action, I might just pull a Lorena Bobbitt on myself. Furthermore, what that woman could possibly see in that guy…I will never know? I don’t think this is a calista flockhart- Harrison ford kind of thing going on here. It did raise a question though, is it hard to clean blood out of the carpet in a double-wide. Patrick OUT!!!

 

Behind my Back

So it came to my attention recently in conversations with my advisor (read: boss) at work that her and other faculty friends of her’s (other people on my committee) talk about my personal life behind my back. Perhaps I’m over reacting a bit but I don’t think that’s really appropriate. Sure its probably my fault for divulging information to one of them but even so, isn’t it an unspoken rule that such conversations remain to some degree privelaged. The incident in question was in regards to the dissolution of the relationship between myself and a long-time girlfriend. One faculty member who was passingly familiar with my relationship status asked how things were going. Not wanting to be rude I gave her the unfortunate breakdown and she has now told another faculty member possibly more than that. Don’t these people have hobbies they could be attending to…better science to be coming up with. No, instead they concern themselves with my personal life and see it fit to bring up sore subjects at work. I have friends for a reason and I have a boss for a reason…they really don’t need to be the same person. If they were to be the same person…that’s really my choice. Also, if you’re going to talk behind my back don’t say things to me that make it totally clear that you have done so. Gossip all you like but keep it out of my earshot. Done. Patrick OUT!!!

Thanksgiving

So this is a delayed post because I’ve been really busy lately. Thanksgiving has passed…my favorite holiday of them all. I ended up spending it in Maryland with my family and my brother-in-law’s family. It was good to see my sister again (it had been quite a while) and to spend time with the two families together. I longed a little for my own families version of thanksgiving…though this was pretty similar…I guess most peoples would be pretty similar but I am such a creature of habit that even small perturbations can screw with my head a little. On thanksgiving morning, I ran a 5k for the first time…actually I had run that distance twice before the actual day but it was the first time competitively. I was a tad bit slower than I had hoped but I’m going to chalk that up to morning tiredness and cold air to start. I must admit though that I felt pretty good afterwards…I’m not sure if it was the endorphins released by the running or the cold cheap beer that found its way in to my hands within about 10 minutes of finishing…could have also been the second (or third or fourth) beer that did it. Either way, thanksgiving started out great. All in all, the rest of the day was pretty low key…just as I would like it. I did have to bite my tongue and sit on my hands a bit as dinner was being made. I can be a bit of a “back seat” chef at times and I was doing my best to not be critical of anything. On Friday we all went and saw the new James Bond movie (which I had already seen but was actually better the second time). Pretty enjoyable all in all…we then came home and ate some more and then a bit more. We had turkey croquettes made from the previous days leftovers which were really quite phenomenal and have inspired me to someday but a deep fryer if for no other purpose than making turkey croquettes and possibly deep fried oreos (which are truly about as delicious as they sound gross). After all the eating was finished I was pleased to also see that I had not gained more than a pound. I’m not sure where those calories went but I am glad they didn’t find their way someplace unpleasant. Bring on Christmas…and lights. Patrick OUT!!!

Why the internet was invented.

http://bacontoday.com/

Nuf said

Patrick OUT!!!

Tree Lighting

So I was involved in a conversation on campus yesterday about the prospect of having “holiday lighting” in various trees for the holiday season. People of some authority for such things decided, in my presence, that they would not be putting forward any recommendation on the matter for fear of offending certain groups with the potentially religious symbolism of lights. WHAT?!?! I know this topic has been done before but seriously. Having lights on trees in December is to Christmas as a large bunny with chocolate eggs is to The Passion. In short, its not religious at all. And besides that, why do people continually have a right to not be offended by such things. I don’t believe in god so much anymore…ok really not at all but I do believe in things that look nice…like little lights in snow covered trees. Not once have I looked at such a tree (even one’s with angels at the top and present underneath) and reconsidered my faith or lack there of. By all rights, the Christmas tree was a tradition of Germanic pagans that was co-opted by Christians for their own far out symbolic purposes. Even so, if you are jewish muslim, bahai, hindu, buddhist, sihk, Zoroastrian, Rastafarian, or even if you believe in the church of the flying spaghetti monster like me…there would never be anything even slightly offensive about little lights hung in a tree on a cold dark winter night. I suppose it all boils down to me being the atheist that says merry Christmas…and happy hannukah, and all the rest of it because these holidays are no longer religious for most of us. They are a chance to exercise our credit cards and more importantly be with family and friends (because we need an excuse to do these things now). Lights in trees is a celebration of just that…a time of year when a good portion of the population should be just a little bit happier despite the bitter cold and bad fruit cake making the rounds. I for one am offended that there will not be lights in trees on campus…why don’t they respect my rights…is it because of all the faiths, mine is the only one that definitely doesn’t have a god on its side??? Patrick OUT!!!

Trivial Matters

So last night I went to my weekly trivia night in Cambridge. That Wednesday night has become the highlight of my week. Typically a Wednesday goes something like this…I get to work and think, “wow, I have not gotten a lot done this week.” And then I remember that on Friday I have my usual meeting with my advisors where I get to justify my existence through the presentation of data. (Astute readers will rightly surmise that I have actually gotten things done this week…hence the blog entry on a Thursday at work.) But anyways, Wednesday is usually that day where I put nose to the grindstone and try to churn something out that looks good enough to pass as science. The whole day, I’m really thinking about going to trivia in the evening. Something about it just really appeals to me…always has I suppose. Its like being on a trimmed down version of jeopardy with people that aren’t quite as smart (gives me a real shot at winning) and furthermore the addition of alcohol (also gives me a real shot at winning…assuming the drink is in someone else’s hand). Of course, my overly competitive spirit kicks in mightily but unlike other things even a losing night was still a night spent with friends so it is never really all bad. Lastly, the questions give me a mental excuse to spend my time on things less worldly…I’m not watching football and drinking beer…I’m doing research for next week. Watching reruns of mash…there might be a question about trapper john this week and I need to be prepared. Of course they never have any questions about the genetic engineering of neutraceuticals or the oxidative elicitation of secondary metabolites (my research topics for those not paying attention) so I probably shouldn’t waste my time with those things Thursday – Tuesday…of course they have never had a question on blogging either, Patrick OUT!!!

X-Mass Time is Here Again

So, I guess its appropriate that with the election of the Obamessiah, that one of my usual classic rock stations is already playing Christmas music. This is totally unnecessary. Why on earth would we want to listen to this musical dribble before even thanksgiving has reared its turkey laden head. Unfortunately, the station is one of my car radio presets and so now as I’m switching through stations on the way to and from work I am continually accosted by the sounds of jingle bell rock. Don’t get me wrong, I liked that song…when I was 6. Now, I have heard it at the very least (in bits and pieces) no fewer than 5 times over the last week. Add in some Johnny mathis and a little “You’re a mean one…Mr. Grinch” and I’m about ready to pull out of all holiday celebrations in general. I don’t want to come across as a holiday miser who is bent on destroying a joyous time for everyone else but it just seems that we should give each season its due. I don’t understand why we should devote 2 months of music to Christmas, a full 1/6^th of the musical year. What if we had other holidays treated like this. How about 2 months of monster mash and giant purple people eater…or 2 months of lee greenwood and god bless the USA around every july 4^th. Actually I take that back, we already have that on most country stations for 12 months a year. But seriously, the bunny hop for two months in april doesn’t sound too appealing but we can get away with frosty the snowman until the cows come home. I want holiday equality. Much like my definitions for equality in society, it means that we can all be equally miserable…thus a moratorium on Christmas carols more than 2 weeks from said holiday is in order. Two weeks is sufficient to get ramped up into the holiday spirit and toasted for all the holiday parties where said songs will be played on a loop as if we couldn’t get enough of them already. Ba Humbug and a happy new year. Patrick OUT!!!

Election Day

So its finally election day in America. After almost 2 years of posturing, campaigning, fundraising, debating and ass kissing, it comes down to what is looking like a major blow-out. I voted this morning…actually I didn’t vote…or maybe I did. I didn’t vote for president. I really wanted to…I even feel a little guilty about not filling in a circle. I just could not in good conscience vote for any of them. I really have an extraordinary apathy towards the whole thing. I don’t believe that the world would end regardless of which one of them wins but I also don’t think that either of them is going to be particularly strong. I will criticize whoever is in office without mercy and because but now I can never honestly say… “don’t blame me I voted for the other one (not barack obama here)”. I was truly more interested in our ballot questions in Massachusetts particularly the state income tax (which I voted to keep…though it doesn’t really matter and I kind of wish it was gone but only if they promised not to raise taxes elsewhere) and the decriminalization of marijuana. That one seems to be pretty much common sense…what kind of a country puts someone in jail for getting a little high but calls it a domestic disturbance when a drunk man or woman beats their spouse. Alcohol and Marijuana are the same in my book, similar dangers to over-use and similar though limited benefits. The difference is that one is illegal and the other is advertised more than any other product (except maybe politicians). Its time the state take a hard look at itself and end the prohibition era teetotalers control  on our existence. And don’t give me that “gateway drug” stuff either. A study by the RAND corporation (no hippy bullshiters here) found no causal link or gateway phenomenon to link marijuana use with increased incidence in the use of heroin or cocaine. I’ve also heard that the 1 ounce limit is too high. Well that may be a lot for some people and maybe even enough to consider selling it but we need to have a law that applies to everyone and that one ounce might not get  Tommy Chong or Snoopp Dogg through a summer afternoon. Plus, think of the economic benefit to vending machine suppliers and 24hr convenience store owners…lets vote pot in for them. Patrick OUT!!!

Douche OFF!

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

-Patrick Out!!!

Present

Can't lose: Obama backs Rays, Phillies

 

So it seems Barack, once again, just can’t make up his mind. He has no endorsed both the Philadelphia Phillies and the Tampa Bay Rays…both present in swing states. This is the sports equivalent of voting “present” rather than taking a stand on the issue. While this is clearly not as bad as Rudy Giuliani endorsing both the red sox and the Yankees…its right up there. I that politicians should not answer questions of sports support any further. They should reply to all queries with, “I’m too busy saving the world to watch sports…but I hear the Yankees suck (and for the first time in quite a number of years…this statement was both emotionally AND factually true)”. In stead, they take a wishy washy stance on team support to try and appeal to everyone…no good. In America, we have teams we love and teams we hate and there is no getting around that. As a New Englander, its my job to hate the Yankees, the lakers, the colts (and jets) and the canadiens…I think I do it well. On a local level, a politician should be the biggest sports fan around…it shows he/she’s folksy and down to earth. On a national level, a politician needs to be beyond that. They need to be beyond that entirely and either take a firm stance against a universally hated team or not say anything at all. For Obama, a good choice in this matter unfortunately would probably be to voice disgust for the patriots…a team/coach not very well liked in the rest of the country. I can hear Rush Limbaugh though, “Obama hates the patriots…un-American, terrorist loving, liberal whiner??? You decide!” I guess that might be a bad move. You can always go after peyton manning…who really likes that guy and his hyper over exposed ad man persona...playing for a team without a winning record with a younger brother who is quickly proving to be a better QB than the old guy. I will do my part and not “vote present” and say…I hate the RAYS!!! If I ever run for office this might come back to haunt me but I just think it’s the right thing to do. Patrick OUT!!!

 

Spoiled Rotten

So as I was driving home yesterday listening to the red sox get beaten like a rented mule…I was honestly thinking to myself, what if they don’t win the world series? What if the patriots don’t win the superbowl? What if the Celtics can’t repeat their championship? Then I remembered…oh yea, then we would be like sports fans in every other city that just hope for that once or twice in a lifetime occurrence where their cities team will win the championship in maybe ONE sport. How quickly I was able to forget about the 86 years (granted I only experienced 21 years) of red sox misery and Ruthian curses. Or the days when the patriots looked like the JV squad of a high school in Alaska…days when people were embarrassed to say they were going to Foxboro on a Sunday. Now, we have championship banners everywhere, pat’s fans pay the highest prices in the league to see their team and have sold out every game since 1994, the red sox have more than 470 consecutive sell-outs at home (streak started in 2003) more than any other team EVER. Even the Celtics, who were actually respectable when I was a kid managed to channel former glory and win a title. All that being said…I’m still a bit disappointed this year in how things are turning out, I guess making the play-offs just isn’t enough anymore. There’s always next year, Patrick OUT!!!

Dirty Politics

I know I said I was done with the campaign but it has once again reeled me back in. I’ll admit that I watched the last debate, of course I’ve already decided to vote for Bob Barr but that’s besides the point. I was hoping that there would be some glimmer of hope from either side…ya know, some idea that the country couldn’t do without. I was sadly disappointed, from Obama we get more of the same, no game changer…no finishing move…no nothing. From McCain, an announcement that his administration would direct the treasury to buy up bad mortgages and renegotiate (i.e replacing ARMs with fixed rates) at a net cost to John Q. Public. So let me get this straight…the “conservative” candidate wants to take more of my money to bail out people who got themselves into irresponsible mortgages? Right. I’ve pretty much given up on the economy at this point and just thank my stars that I wasn’t planning on retiring any time soon and don’t have any of my personal wealth tied up in home values. On an entirely different front, news that ACORN has been fraudulently registering voters. Apparently dirty politics extends beyond the big bad republican party to a left-wing get out the vote group. Listening to the radio someone commented that just because the registrations were fraudulent doesn’t mean that votes will be cast because dead people can’t come out and vote but since these same groups also oppose the usage of ID checks at polling stations…I could go vote as a dead person. Actually, in casting a vote for Bob Barr…I am voting as a dead person. What a downer that is. My favorite thing about ACORN is their public platform of supporting the “living-wage” increases and the applying for exemption in California from having to pay their own workers minimum wage. Apparently, if their employees made minimum wage then they wouldn’t be able to empathize with the poor people they serve. Right. So what do we learn from all this…ACORN employees break the law and are apparently really stupid to be working for this organization in the first place. Well, I’m off to go register my great grand-parents to vote…they may not have been citizens and they may not still be alive but that doesn’t mean they wouldn’t vote Barr in 2008 if they could…let their voices be heard. Si se puede! Si se puede! Patrick OUT!!!